


Charity Boxing Match

by almaia



Category: Political RPF, Political RPF - Canadian 21st c., Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boxing & Fisticuffs, Lolitics - Freeform, M/M, Male Homosexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 05:46:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9586358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/almaia/pseuds/almaia
Summary: Two politicians duke it out in the boxing cage for charity in a match that could make or break their careers.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FromAshesToStardust](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FromAshesToStardust/gifts).



> Disclaimer: The content of this work is purely fictional even if the characters are real life figures and some real life events are referenced to. No disrespect and political bias is intended by this work.

**_MGM Grand Garden Arena – Las Vegas, Nevada_ **

“What’s up Nevada, how is everybody doing?” Steve Harvey asked to the ram-packed MGM Grand Garden Arena. Today was the legendary charity boxing match between Philippine Senator Manny Pacquiao and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

After Steve Harvey asked the question, the crowds of MGM Grand Garden Arena, which was mostly made up of Manny Pacquiao fans and Justin Trudeau’s Truhearts, went wild.

“You guys ready to see a little ass kicking tonight?”

And the crowd went even louder. Chavit Singson, an ardent supporter of Manny Pacquiao, was cheering the loudest – he was closer to another million dollars if the PacMan wins. Meanwhile, Mommy Dionisia, Pacquiao’s mother, was busy praying her ninth round of the rosary. She saw to it to pray the rosary twelve times in a row – a representation of her prayer that Manny Pacquiao would emerge the winner of the match after the twelve rounds.

“I have to apologize.”

And the crowd suddenly went silent.

“Not again you fucking _hoser_!”  Bill Morneau shouted

“Putang ina mo talaga Steve Harvey!” Mommy Dionisia yelled, “Sana mapunta ka sa impyerno!”

(“You son of a bitch Steve Harvey! I hope you go to hell!”)

“This isn’t a Manny Pacquiao versus Justin Trudeau boxing match.” Steve said in the most remorseful voice

“Gago, matatalo na ako sa pustahan!” Chavit shouted, “Naubusan na nga ako ng pera sa kakahost ng Miss Universe, umeepal ka pa talaga!”

(“Idiot, I’m gonna lose the bet! I’ve already run out of money from hosting Miss Universe and here you are!”)

And in that moment, the fans of both politicians were duped big time. They paid a lot of money to be able to watch this match in the arena – only to be told that the match is not quite what they expect it to be. Nobody flew all the way from Manila, or all the way from Ottawa – only to see this happen. No one!

“Make some noise everybody, put your hands together, make some noise!” Steve said, going back to his excited tone, as if he didn’t come back from remorsefully apologizing earlier, “The host of NBC’s The Apprentice, give it up for – President Donald Trump!”

Then Donald Trump made his entrance into the arena as the audience started cheering. For the Pacquiao fans, it was because they held on to the hope that Manny would take down Trump. For the Trudeau fans, it was because they held on to the hope that Justin would be the one to beat Trump. None of them were cheering for Trump. This wasn’t Trump’s ball game.

“Donald Trump! Donald Trump! Donald Truuump!” Steve Harvey yelled as Trump was flanked by two skimpily-dressed women who threw wads of cash towards the audience.

Trump then entered the boxing cage and with a microphone on his hand, he asked, “Are you ready for the man-slammin’ action?”

The crowd erupted into cheers. But only because they were waiting for either Justin Trudeau or Manny Pacquiao to show up.

“Who’s ready for old fashioned hetero fest?”

And the crowd cheered yet again!

“Are you 100% hetero like me?”

And only half of the crowd cheered this time.

Donald Trump then proceeded to tear off the dresses of the two women with him, revealing that they were wearing Star-Sprangled bikinis underneath. This elicited cheers of “USA! USA! USA!” from the audience.

“Who here is proud to be American?”

This time, only a quarter of the audience cheered.

“Let me hear you say American Pride!”

And sarcastically, the audience replied “American Pride!”

And this went on for two more minutes because Donald Trump failed to realize that the audience were only responding to him sarcastically. No one was there to waste their time watching a Cheeto stall a much-awaited boxing match.

“I’m so American that when I bought my mansion, the first thing I did was pull out the back door!”

Then the audience laughed at his anecdote just so that he would shut up already – but boy, they were so wrong!

“You know why? Because my asshole is just for shitting.”

They cheered at him again, hoping to shut him up so that Steve Harvey could start the fight.

“It’s great to be with the American people! It’s great now not to have any Mexicans here!”

“You’re a piece of shit!” somebody from the audience said

“Who called me a piece of shit?” Donald asked, “Whoever called me a piece of shit, come up here and I’ll beat your ass! Who calls The Donald a piece of shit? Come up here!”

Suddenly, Justin Trudeau stood from the audience, shocking everyone in the arena. There he was in his Prime Ministerial glory. His beautiful face glistening from the arena’s lights. As he walked up to the boxing ring with his head held up high, _Oh Canada_ started playing in the background.

Donald Trump was in pure shock as Justin walked closer to the cage. He was having this strange feeling – this one strange feeling he was trying to suppress. _No Donald, you’re a straight American man. Married to the hottest model in all of Slovenia. There’s no way you’ll find that Canadian boy toy hot._

“Let him in.” Donald said with aggression as Justin was ushered into the cage – to the cheering of the audience who were thankful that they were getting half of what they expected and half of what they paid for.

“Who wants to see me beat this fag’s ass?” Donald asked the audience – and Manny Pacquiao’s fans cheered, “Who wants to see me beat this-“ but before Donald could continue, Justin suddenly launched in his direction and pushed him to the other end of the cage.

Justin then proceeded to knee Donald in the nuts as the crowd’s cheers grew wilder. Justin was so determined to beat the President of the United states into pieces. Oh boy, he surely is!

Up next, Justin punched Donald on his head – delivering one blow after another. His goal this time was to knock the Cheeto unconscious. And at last, Justin tackled him to the ground and put him on a headlock. As Donald tried to struggle underneath him and as he tried to punch his stomach, Justin asserted his dominance further, making sure that Donald was kept on the floor.

Justin then continued to punch Donald, this time on the face. He wasn’t going to let him get off the floor anytime soon. Heck, the only time he was going to get off the floor is when the Paramedics come to take him away.

Mustering all his strength, Donald managed to throw Justin off him. This led the crowd to cheer louder. They were seeing some plot twist happen in the fight and they were starting to sense that the money they paid for this was all worth it.

This time, Donald launched and took Justin to the throat as he pushed him to the opposite side of the cage. But what happened next was very unexpected – this time, Donald ceased holding Justin’s throat and instead, he pinned him by the wall of the cage and…he looked at him lustfully.

The sound technicians at the sound booth saw this as an opportunity and started playing the instrumental track to “My Heart Will Go On”. As the crowds continued to cheer, Justin spit blood off his mouth before locking his eyes with Donald’s. Now both of them were looking at each other lustfully as the audience started to sport looks that said _we’ve been ripped off!_

Celine Dion, who was supposed to sing the Canadian National Anthem (if not for Steve Harvey fucking up the entire fight at the beginning), took a microphone and started singing to her hit single from 1997. Even she wasn’t going to let this opportunity pass through.

_Love can touch us one time_

_And last for a lifetime_

_And never let go 'til we're gone_

As if by instinct, Donald and Justin started to make out – to the horror of the audience who didn’t pay to see this. Some dropped their food, others were merely gobsmacked. Then there were chants of “Putang ina ninyo” (“You sons of whores!”) coming from the side of the arena where Manny Pacquiao’s fans were situated. Paris Hilton covered her mouth out of disgust as she watched what was going on. Not that she was homophobic but she sure as hell did not sign up to see Justin Trudeau being manhandled by Donald Turmp.

Mommy Dionesia went on to shout “MALASWAAAA!” (“DISGUSTING!”) as she threw her Hermes Handbag into the cage, hoping that it would hit either of the politicians. She didn’t like any of them because they weren’t her son, Manny Pacquiao.

_Love was when I loved you_

_One true time I hold to_

_In my life we'll always go on_

Donald and Justin then slowly started to undress each other – not caring about what the audience thinks of them. Meanwhile, Steve Harvey was looking pretty horrified – he shouldn’t have apologized earlier and let the fight go on as it was advertised if all it came down was to this.

Bill Morneau, out of frustration, took off his pair of shoes and threw it into the cage, towards Donald Trump. He was not going to let anybody who wasn’t Sophie Grégoire-Trudeau, Barack Obama or Theresa May lay their hands on his darling Prime Minister.

Donald then inched down a bit and started to nibble on Justin Trudeau’s nipples. Yes, this was getting sleazier by the minute but neither of them cared. They just wanted to share a moment together regardless of whether one of them would get hit by a steel chair later or not.

Donald then descended until he was now on his knees. Slowly, he proceeded to unbutton Justin Trudeau’s trousers. An angry Chavit Singson started making the “No Deal” sign because there went his one million dollars – gone and forgotten all because the President of the United States and the Prime Minister of Canada couldn’t get a damn room! He would have at least appreciated it if they used his one million dollars to get themselves a damn room but that wasn’t even the case.

_Near, far, wherever you are_

_I believe that the heart does go on_

_Once more you open the door_

_And you're here in my heart_

_And my heart will go on and on_

Donald pulled the Canadian Prime Minister’s trousers down, revealing his briefs that had Canadian Flag prints all over it. Justin lovingly held Donald’s head at the same time as his fans started cheering “Go Canada!” at the sight of his briefs. It was as if this was Rio 2016 all over again and Canada was on its way to bringing home a lot of medals.

“Get out of my town!” the Mayor of Las Vegas shouted towards the cage

Donald then kissed Justin’s stomach before pushing him down the ground. As the two descended to the ground, they were locked in a kiss. This time, the audience grew even more dissatisfied – because they came for a boxing match but instead, now they’re forced to watch a couple make love. This was clearly not done in their informed consent and thus, they had all the right to feel so disgusted about it.

_We'll stay forever this way_

_You are safe in my heart_

_And my heart will go on and on_

Justin and Donald were now making out passionately on the ground as more objects rained down into the cage – handbags, shoes, coats – you name it!

Then, Justin stood up and pulled Donald’s trousers by the legholes – effectively dragging Donald across the cage as he did so. An enraged audience member then proceeded to pick up a steel chair from the VIP section, ready to throw it into the cage.

Donald then tried to pull Justin’s briefs at first but went against it and decided to kneel down, bending Justin over in the process as the steel chair made its way into the cage, narrowly missing Justin. Donald then had his hands all over Justin’s chest as Justin reached out for his neck with his arms. Then from there, their lovemaking session continued.

“Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!” The audience chanted

There was no news on whether Steve Harvey was still going to be compensated for his failed gig, or whether Celine Dion was going to get a bonus or whether the audience were going to get their refund.

But certainly, Chavit Singson didn’t come home a richer man and Mommy Dionesia returned to the Philippines with one less designer handbag.

That didn’t matter – what mattered was that Justin and Donald finally came to terms with their attraction to each other, even if it meant having to hijack a much-awaited boxing match in the process.

**_Love Wins, indeed._ **


End file.
